Boredom is Self-care True or False

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The answer to this question is like most questions we all ask ourselves; it depends on many factors.

For me this is a true statement “Boredom is Self Care.” I use boredom to imagine, problem solve, and figure out how to implement the steps to cultivate a life that I believe I desire, for now. Who knows if once on the journey, my direction of desire will change. 

“All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

To understand why this is true for me, as an older adult I crave nothing on my MUST to do list. This list being blank rarely happens as there is alway earning income to pay for necessities of life and relaxation. Say it’s a day off well then the house needs to be cleaned in some fashion including dishes, cleaning the floor, the never ending laundry pile, and of course dusting but who really does that? Those rare days I seem to fill the time with electronics, media entertainment mostly. That movie that I did not have time to see in the theater or the next new series. Mostly doomscrolling, I have no idea who coined that term but it is very accurate. Media of all kinds is there to fill the boredom. 

Looking back at my childhood, the phrase “I’m bored” said to any older adult was met with “I can give you something to do” At first you fall for it and say “what?” expecting entertainment that involves fun. Then sadly the response of this X chore needs to be done or you can help me do X chore (at least you would not have to do it by yourself). So by second grade if you were ever bored you would only think it or say it under your breath hoping no one actually heard you. Upon reflection from an adulthood perspective, I understand. If you helped as a kid (even if it was not the best) it was a step closer for that MUST do list that parents needed to complete. I, like many of the kids my age, figured out how to fill this boredom time with things we enjoyed, used our imaginations, and escaped with outdoor activities. 

My kids heard the same thing from me, figure it out or there are chores to complete. Then I eventually just assigned the chores to lighten the load. I told myself they needed to know how to do this and to take care of their future home. Which was true, as it did not seem that those futuristic robots that folded and put laundry away were being invented. I know I could have invented it but I am not mechanical in any way shape or form. So be grateful I did not invent it as it probably would have destroyed the house. My hats off to those of you that are mechanical, please invent this robot/machine. Back to my train of thought, the kids did need to know this information and how to manage their time to get everything completed.  Like most households it did not work well. 

Once they received personal gadgets that had media, the “I’m bored” era ended, so did their need to communicate in person or be physically active. My downfall too! We did what all good parents of my generation did, enrolled the kids in activities they seemed interested in that did not involve a screen. The household MUST do list just got longer and boredom was again replaced by exhaustion and determination to get that list completed. This is not to say we do not enjoy media, I am just saying something on the MUST do list was replaced with media which prevented the feeling of peace that everything was accomplished. Media probably was not the only barrier preventing peace, but it was the most evident.

During a time where my life as I knew it came to a sudden halt. My supportive family came to the rescue and changed their lives to help me. Their MUST do list just got larger, while mine became abnormally short. I started spending my time doing things that were challenging at the time and beneficial to my healing such as reading children books, coloring, and putting together jigsaw puzzles.

While I was doing these things for other reasons than fun. I did start having fun doing them as I like a challenge and these were challenges. These activities helped my life return to “normal” that is busy with a longer list of to do’s. Slowly reading, coloring, and jigsaw puzzles fell off the MUST do list, then even fell off the Nice to do list. The opportunities to be bored were gone again, replaced by exhaustion and only the energy to move my thumb or finger enough to be entertained by all the media.

Recently, I decided instead of being bored and filling that time with doomscrolling. I added just a jigsaw puzzle on a card table. This added enjoyment to my daily life. Some days only 1 or 2 pieces would be placed and other days many pieces would be placed, both while watching media . After a while I noticed the media was just background noise and I really was not paying attention. So, I put on reruns that I had seen and practically memorized, just for the noise. I did try listening to a podcast but I was too distracted by the jigsaw puzzle to pay attention. Not only was I enjoying myself but I was actively problem solving and using my working memory. Problem solving was not limited to the jigsaw puzzle and trying to remember where that piece was that I saw on the left hand-side of the table was that would now go perfectly in this spot. My mind was considering how to make more time available for other non-media activities. Surprisingly while placing a single puzzle piece a solution to a temporary storage issue came to mind. I was able to let my mind wander to a minor problem and a solution was found. Now while only a minor problem and probably only bugged me in my household. Just like when I moved the items and no one seemed to notice, but the Figure-Out list is now shorter! A simple win. 

There is a saying that “If you do not fill your time someone else will be happy too.” (I am not sure who said it.) All this to say I did start adding back time for boredom and it has granted me the time to decide how I really want to spend my days versus how I need to survive my days. I have added larger jigsaw puzzles back into my day as I enjoy them the most. As I have mentioned, I like to challenge myself, but I do have to keep the size to the card table. Unfortunately, when the holidays come around, I may have to put that card table to a different use. There are wonderful jigsaw puzzle tables out there but space for the moment is a commodity. This scheduled boredom time also has allowed me to ponder many other things I actually want to do or learn to do. 

I will tell you about those things as I continue to explore them in my scheduled boredom time!

I created the artwork for this jigsaw puzzle on Zazzle. I am currently putting it together, the pieces do not click together as tightly as I would like but it looks wonderful to me.